Faffing v. focusing - gyroscope or laser beam?

I have a pretty short attention span and can often lack focus.  In my defence though, if something really grabs my interest then I can also get totally absorbed and super-focused.  Just one of the many contradictions in my personality!

Obviously this is not a good thing when you’re a writer – working on your own, with no deadlines or bosses to keep happy (at the moment, anyway!).

The negative effect of lack of focus struck me anew recently when reading “The Purpose Driven Life” by Rick Warren.  This image captured how I’ve been feeling recently:

“Many people are like gyroscopes, spinning around at a frantic pace but never going anywhere.”

I always have lots of things going on in my life!  Good things.  Great things!  I’m often super busy.  I’m very good at getting distracted by interesting things – there are so many! - as well as new challenges/projects.

Rick Warren continued, challenging me and bringing about a light bulb moment (pardon the pun) ;-)

“The power of focusing can be seen in light.  Diffused light has little power or impact, but you can concentrate its energy by focusing it.  With a magnifying glass, the rays of the sun can be focused to set grass or paper on fire [or in the case of my son, his brother’s duvet cover!!].  When light is focused even more as a laser beam, it can cut through steel.

There is nothing quite as potent as a focused life, one lived on purpose.  The men and women who have made the greatest difference in history were the most focused.”

Now, I am writing my book and working at becoming a writer.  And I will definitely get to the point where this manuscript is as complete as I can possibly make it (whether or not it gets published then is largely out of my control).  BUT, I would get to the finish line with it a helluva lot faster if I got more focused!  Too many other things still butt into the time that I set aside for writing – and that amount of allocated time isn’t as generous as it could be.

When I actually sit down and write, it’s great!  Surprisingly great!  In fact, last week I added a prologue that I’m thrilled with, made the first chapter more punchy and exciting, and incorporated a diary device that adds depth to an important few days that were previously skated over a bit fast.  If I got focused and made that amount of progress every week then I would have been finished about 3 months ago, easily!!! 

Although I can be very emotional, I’m also very cerebral.  If I something clicks for me mentally then that’s that, problem solved.  This section of “Purpose Driven Life” feels like it’s provided clear insight for why I’m not moving forward with my writing as I want to.  You might be thinking it was super obvious and I guess it is, but it’s still useful to have it spelled out:  

“If you want your life to have impact, focus it!  Stop dabbling.  Stop trying to do it all.  Do less.  Prune away even good activities and do only that which matters most.  Never confuse activity with productivity.”

Simples, right?!  I feel like I know what practical steps to take to improve the situation, but better than that I also feel more determined rather than just powerless or hopeless or useless.  And I need to be determined coz I love dabbling and I love trying to do it all :-)

It's not the only area of my life that needs more focusing. Lots of different aspects of life could benefit from being more focused.  If you want to win a race then you focus on the finish line, rather than looking around at the other runners.  If you want to get good exams results, you focus on your revision and exams, rather than the social stuff you’re missing out on.  If you want to lose weight, you focus on your goal weight and not on the biscuit tin!  Fixing your eyes and mind on your goal, and going for it whole-heartedly, is going to make a much bigger difference than meandering your way towards it ever could.

Trump-tastic Trouser Truffles (thanks Dan!)

What an awesome thing crowd-sourcing is - Facebook at its best :-)

I’ve recently had my most popular status on Facebook and it was all about farts.  Or rather what they could be called instead of “fart”.  Who knew that it would grab so many people’s attention and interest?!

Here’s why I did it (aside from the fact that it was serious fun and I might just have to do it again for no good reason!).  Jeannie’s feedback on my manuscript was really encouraging– which I wasn’t expecting as I’d started to convince myself it was complete rubbish (very common for writers to swing between “this is great” and “this is tosh” with their work, often within the same 10 minute period).  However, one seemingly small, but actually massive, thing she flagged up was my use of “whizz” as the codeword my two main characters use for “fart”.

It’s American for “pee”, which I guess I knew but had conveniently forgotten.  Now who knows whether or not this book will ever get published but, just in case it does, it makes sense to smooth its path to being published globally as well and avoid obvious pitfalls like that from the start.

The BIG problem is that “whizz” is used a lot in the book, when they’re discussing farts.  Plus Ben (the lead character) is a runner, so it plays on the idea that running fast could also be described as whizzing (it makes sense when you read the book – at least I hope it does!).  Any alternative word has to nicely fit both uses, so what on earth could be an appropriate substitute?!

Disheartened I turned to my friends for help.  And what a wonderful crazy wave of creativity I was met with!!!  No less than 54 inspired suggestions :-)

I was then faced with the new problem of selecting the right one!   “Fluff” was my initial favourite (thank you Natalie and others) until I realised that it’s quite common for ladies to use that term for farting anyway.  Next I loved “traf” (thank you Jodie), especially as kids think it’s fun to spell words backwards.  I told Jeannie about this change and she asked if I’d googled it to check it out.

Oh.  My.  Goodness.  Thence began an Urban Dictionary education I wish I hadn’t needed to have.  I do have to be thorough, especially with a kids’ book, so it is a necessary evil!  Right, I’m not using “traf” then :-(  

Okay, I’ll change “fluff” to “floof” I thought.  That’s a completely made up word.  Apparently not.  It’s slang for ladies’ bits.  Great.

I checked out “flump” and “gurgler” (thanks Tom) before despairing completely.  What is the world coming to?  Has every word been corrupted and got a dodgy alternative meaning??

Just before I chucked the whole manuscript in the bin, thankfully inspiration came to me in a swoosh.  And “swoosh” it almost was, but it's not completely perfect on the Urban Dictionary and Nike might take issue.  However, I think I can get away with “whoosh”.  Similar onomatopoeia to “whizz”, but with no majorly dodgy connotations (that I’ve managed to find so far, anyway).

I’ve tweaked the scene where Ben and Ned discuss what to call his farts and it’s even funnier and richer now thanks to the inclusion of some of your suggestions.  If the book gets published as a series (my ultimate hope!) then I’ll be able to incorporate more of these crazy and wonderful words in the future (subject to the Urban Dictionary test).  If you provided any of these ideas then THANK YOU!!  I may not have used your exact suggestions as my replacement word but your creativity fuelled my creativity.  It was a real pleasure to have you involved in part of my writing journey too - feel free to join in again sometime :-)

Sharing My "Baby" (the detailed progress update!)

I’ve been pretty philosophical in recent posts (and will be again!), so I figured a real progress update was in order for a change.  The last one I did shared that editing the second draft is much harder than writing the first draft, as it’s a much more skilled task. 

A decisive moment in that process came when I got a few days holiday in America back in March.  It gave me the time and space to lay my book out in chapters - each with a post-it summarising what happens in that section - to look at its structure and progress. 

What a simple but powerful act that was!  Possibly it would be for any writer but because I’m such a visual person, seeing it like this meant I instantly understood how it fitted together and where it didn't work.  It enabled me to iron out various issues with the manuscript – especially with its timings.  So, just before the Easter holidays I completed the second draft and printed it out to give to a couple of families (as well as mine) to read and critique. 

Sharing my “baby” was a scary thing!  I've kept it close to my chest since its conception, and no one has read more than about a page of it so far.  But despite the fact I’m such a perfectionist and my own harshest critic, I needed external feedback before I could take it much further.  So I handed over the manuscripts.  And then waited with great fear and trepidation!

I expected the feedback from Jeannie, my writing accountability partner, to be tough. After all, she's a writer and she would be able to pick weak points apart. So I was flabbergasted and thrilled that it was really positive and encouraging.  She made me believe that I actually might be able to do this!  There were plenty of suggestions for tweaks, but overall her and her kids had loved it. Especially - and most importantly - her 8 year old son (the book is aimed at 7-10 year olds, especially boys)!

With the second lot of feedback, I’d foolishly asked my friends to be extremely critical – mainly coz I thought they’d be too nice otherwise – and so it was own fault that I got what I asked for!  It was a painful, but powerful lesson for me about how to ask for feedback.  It’s just as important to ask people what they like and what they think works, as well as what they don’t like and what doesn’t work.  Without the positive stuff it’s too easy to feel demoralised and want to use the manuscript to light a fire that evening!

I also learnt that while feedback from anyone can be helpful, it’s particularly effective if you’re careful who you ask too.  What the target audience think is key.  One of my 12 year old son’s first comments when I asked him for feedback was “It’s not exactly The Hunger Games, is it?”  Er no, sweetheart, it isn’t meant to be :-S  Feedback from a 12 year old girl was that it wasn’t her cup of tea, but she could see that 7-10 year old boys might like it.  That’s not to say that these kids’ opinions aren’t useful, but they're unlikely to be as valuable as feedback from the specific target audience.

Feedback is also subjective and I’m now working through it, deciding what I’ll change on the basis of it and what I won’t.  That can be very complicated though.  For example, the age-appropriateness of language I use at times was one thing flagged up.  To some extent I agree with those comments and have made a few changes.  BUT, I also examined the language used in books like “How To Train Your Dragon” and David Walliams’ “Billionaire Boy” and became completely confused.

“HTTYD” is sometimes defined as being for 7-10 year olds and sometimes for 8-12 year olds.  They’re actually quite different categories and represent a massive range of reading abilities!  The book contains some fabulous words, including many that wouldn’t fit into the recommended guidelines for a 7-10 year old age range.  So, aside from the wonderful but challenging Viking names, we also find “preposterously” on the first page, “initiation” on the second and “cacophony” on the fifth.

In “Billionaire Boy” (a similarly confusing age-categorised book) we also have “preposterously” on the second page, as well as “masseuse” on the third and “palatial” not long after.

So, yes, there are generally accepted norms, but rules are always made to be broken and it can be fun to see what you can get away with.  I love all these words!  Also, kids always need a few new or difficult words.  If it’s in context it can be figured out.  If not, then you can ask someone else, or just get on and not let that one word detract from all the other thousands of words in the book.  It’s about balance and getting that right is my current challenge.

Having your word critiqued is tough!  I doubt it ever gets easier either, but I’m desperately hoping I never get a review like this one of Dan Brown’s new novel.  I don’t care how many books you’ve written or how many millions you have – to be taken apart in such a shrewd and public way, albeit brilliant as well, has still got to hurt.

I’m now working on the third edit of the manuscript – this may seem like a never-ending process to you non-writers out there but allegedly seven (yes, seven!) drafts is the norm.  I’m hoping for four edits, maximum five (please!)!

P.S. Jeannie’s feedback also raised an interesting big issue which I'll explain in more detail in a few days… ;-)

A Not-Really-A-Book-Review Book Review

I love reading - the perfect day would definitely include time chilling out with a book - but it's one of the first things to get pushed to the bottom of the pile when I'm busy.  When I do read, it is a dangerous activity as well though coz if a book's any good, once I've started it then I become desperate to get to the end and can't put it down!  There's a serious risk that I'll forget to keep appointments, pick my kids up from school or feed them :-) 

However, one of the principal pieces of advice given by published writers to wannabe writers is "read, read, read" or to put it another way "the more you read, the better you'll write". Since realising that reading is such an essential part of my "work" as a writer, I protect it better and it stays much higher up my priorities list. Hurray :-)

When I started this blog I didn't consider including book reviews as part of it.  Despite my degree being English Literature and Language, I hated having to deconstruct and analyse books in tutorials.  All I knew is whether or not I enjoyed them.  Enjoyment is still my primary concern when reading, but now I also understand that how enjoyable a book is is mostly down to how well it's written.

And when I've found something I enjoy then I want to share it with people :-)

"Torn" by David Massey is about a 19-year-old girl/woman, Ellie, a newly qualified British Army medic, on her first tour in Afghanistan. There's a compulsory love interest in the background, but the main action centres around the battle in Afghanistan in general and 2 Afghan kids in particular.

As the story and the situation unfold it becomes increasingly difficult to see who's right and wrong, friend or foe.  The lines shift and blur between the UK/US Army, the Afghan people, the Taliban, the Afghan Security and the kids. This is not a place or situation where things are black and white, but many many shades of grey.

How can you tell what's true and right in a situation, especially one as brutal and confusing as this?  It's an intriguing and challenging story as you're pulled one way and then the other with the characters, as the adventure progresses, more information comes to light and the "truth" seems first one thing and then another.

It's pretty gruesome in parts and there are inevitable deaths, but it wouldn't be at all realistic without that, given the setting , and I thought each situation was handled well.

It seemed such a realistic portrayal of life in a front-line battle situation to me that I was convinced the author must have had first hand experience.  Apparently not, if the acknowledgements at the end of the book are to be believed - he's picked up a lot of it from Call of Duty (!) and friends (who may have first hand experience?). This surprised and also intrigued me as one of the other fundamental principles of writing is "write what you know".  It also encouraged me as one Young Adult book idea I'm playing with involves a CBRN incident and although I have some insight into what might happen (thanks to a great training course I attended last year), I've never actually been in a CBRN incident thankfully!  It's a relief to remember how much work the imagination does, although realism and authenticity are still important.

What I love about "Torn" is what I love about YA fiction as a genre - it deals with difficult issues and situations in a realistic and thought-provoking way. It's pacy and pithy, because its shorter than adult fiction, so it stimulates rather than drains. It takes you on a journey where you learn more not just about an actual situation, but also about how people react and behave in these situations.  This consequently makes me consider what I would do if faced with the same scenarios and choices.  You could call it personal character development through fiction! 

Enjoying a book is a good thing for any reader.  Understanding why and what I enjoy about a book is an even better thing for me as a writer!

(P.S. If you'd like a "real" review of Torn, then there's a great one here! - http://www.booksbiscuitsandtea.co.uk/posts/review-torn-david-massey/)

One Bite At A Time

Years ago when working in a training environment I did the Belbin test for the first time and discovered that I don't have a “completer finisher” bone in my body!

I think it has a lot to do with my self-diagnosed ADD (that’s a tale for another time!) and the fact that there are so many interesting things to be doing in the world.  I'm always looking for the next project and challenge before I've finished the last one. 

I knew, therefore, that this would be a particular challenge with writing a book and may be a large part of why I naturally veer towards writing children's and young adult fiction (they’re shorter!).

Despite only being in the middle of the second draft of my manuscript (and having recently learned that 7 drafts is "normal", noooo!!), my mind is already wandering off thinking about potential story lines for future books in the series, as well as possible scenarios for YA books!  It’s tempting to do some work on those but I’m never gonna get this book finished if I do. 

Recently I was amazed to discover that a friend of mine had never heard the saying/joke:

"How do you eat an elephant? 

One bite at a time." 

Fantastic illustration attributed to Sean Gallo at www.seangallo.com

It’s the daily guiding principle of my life (aside from my relationship with God, of course!)!!  Taking things one bite - or step - at a time is the only way I get anything done, especially when I’m overwhelmed by an impossible to-do list or a project that seems too big.  It’s also how I got through my depression on a daily basis (and still do in the low patches). In all things I’ve learnt to focus on the goal and press on towards that, one step at a time.

It’s actually how we function all the time, we’re just not aware of it.  If I want to get from this desk to the kitchen to get a drink then I have to put one foot in front of the other.  Most of the time I don’t think twice about it.  But if I had an injury that made walking difficult then each step would be a challenge and I would have a greater sense of achievement when I finally made it to the kettle than I usually do :-D

When things are tough we’re more aware of each step but it’s important to recognise that it’s still movement forward and celebrate that.  

The initial writing of my manuscript felt easy and fairly instinctive – like a normal walk to the kitchen - as I just let the ideas and story gush out.  Editing a manuscript is much more challenging as there are so many different major and minor elements that need analysing and adjusting – each step is a real effort and needs serious application from me.  Some days I wonder if I’ll actually manage to produce a polished finished manuscript that’s ready to submit to a literary agent.

However if I keep chipping away at it, not letting the enormity of the task overwhelm me but take it one addition/deletion/tweak at a time, then I have much more confidence that I will get there….one day :-)

Challenging or Crippling?

Comparing yourself, or your work, to someone else can be challenging (in a good way) or it can be crippling.  On the positive side, it might bring out your competitive edge and push you on to do better or achieve more.  Often though, comparison can quickly cause a whole gamut of negative emotions to come into play.   

One of the biggest obstacles I've faced recently is not being crushed by comparing myself to others - in this context as a writer, but I'm good at doing it in general too!  It's easy to forget that I can choose how I respond.

I’ve been re-reading some of the best kids’ books out there, in order to look at their openings, character development, structure, etc. so that I can get some hints and tips for improving my second draft.  It’s so easy to end up feeling seriously inferior in the face of that though and “How To Train Your Dragon” has been the worst culprit!  If I could write like anyone else then it would be Cressida Cowell (or JK Rowling or Suzanne Collins too, but let’s not go there).

I know that I need to let her impressive writing spur me on to write the very best book I can myself, yet it would be too easy to take the path of letting the comparison not only cripple me, but crush me to the point that I decide I could never be as good as her and give up completely.  

I even feel like that with this blog!!  A couple of friends have recently started new blogs and they're way better than mine already (imho), especially as they’re posting in and promoting their blogs much more than me - I don’t even remember to tag my posts or advertise their existence on Twitter most of the time!  I’d give you the links if I were a better person, but I’m not, hahahahaha*.  They’ve already caused me to wrestle with the temptation not to bother writing mine anymore.

So why do I bother writing this blog or books at all?  I guess I feel, like most writers, that I have thoughts and stories I want to share and, while at times they may be similar to other people’s, they are nevertheless unique because they’re told with my voice.  They may not be as good – that’s for a publisher and the public to ultimately decide – but they’re still something that no one apart from me can say.  I can't write like Cressida Cowell (my life is too boring for a start, compared to hers!) but even if I could then I wouldn't get published coz she already is and people want something fresh and new to read, not a lesser imitation.

I will always be second best at being someone else so I may as well just write my blog and my books, in my way and my voice, to the very best of my ability and see what happens :-)  And that holds true for whatever you do too!

*Oh go on then, here they are.  http://confessionsofanamerican.com/ is the website/blog of my amazing writing accountability partner Jeannie – full of funny cross-cultural comments, writing thoughts and powerful insights into human trafficking.  http://markrushworth.me/ is the new blog of one of my church elders – Ordinary Guy, Extraordinary God (The Musings of a British Church Leader) – and contains a particularly good post on Oscar Pistorius “Fallen Heroes”.  The one on "Freedom From Self-esteem" was posted while I was drafting this post and is clearly something I need to get more of a handle on, LOL!