Endless Editing

I recently saw one of those questionable-authenticity-but-carries-more-than-a-grain-of-truth-in-it statistics:

“Writing a book is 10% writing and 90% editing.”

Man, that is so true!  I’m just working on my fourth draft of B4 (code name!).  It took roughly 3 months to write the first draft – if you don’t count the year it took to write the first 5,000 words and the preceding 15 years when I just carried the idea around in my head.  The second and third drafts also took roughly 3 months each to do.

This draft is NOT going to take 3 months!!!  For a start I’m desperate to have a go at a few other pieces of writing – mainly YA (Arvon course in 3 weeks and counting), but also brainstorming ideas for future B4 books, which would make this first one into the beginning of a series.

I’ve also had September in my mind for a while as my goal month for being ready to start submitting the manuscript to literary agents.  While no one else is holding me to that, I’m going to be seriously annoyed with myself if I don’t manage it.  At the same time, I have zero intention of rushing this edit just to meet that deadline, as submitting a manuscript that’s anything less than my best would make all my hard work and learning during the last year utterly pointless.

Editing is hard work though!  It’s endless deleting, tweaking, re-wording, re-ordering, and checking and double-checking that the narrative thread still works despite the alterations.  Some days it’s feels like I’m taking a scalpel to the manuscript, making small changes.  That might be modifying a line of dialogue so it sounds more natural or fits better with the voice of the character.  Or it might be swapping a bland word for a funnier word, or adding extra comical detail – useful things I learnt at Swanwick!  As Mark Twain said:

“The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.”

Other days I attack the manuscript with a machete!  Last week, for example, I cut about 3,000 words – amalgamating 2 chapters and completely cutting another.  On one hand, I’m very happy that it’s improved the pace and reduced the word count to closer to what I'd like it to be.  On the other hand, I have to consciously not contemplate the fact that a whole week (or two’s) worth of writing has been wiped out with a few presses of the delete button.

The impact that cut or changed sections have on the continuity of the narrative is my biggest constant concern.  For example, I’ve deleted the opening chapter where Ben meets Miss Bitts, the Headteacher, for the first time.  Its omission means that in the third chapter when she takes an assembly, that’s now the first time Ben experiences her and discovers what a horror she is (along with the rest of the school!), rather than it just confirming and adding to his previous first encounter with her.  While the flavour and humour of the scene remained the same, it had to be rewritten to accommodate this fundamentally different situation.  Hopefully it was improved at the same time as well, as I got to caricature Miss Bitts more!

The other problem with editing is that you can get so immersed in the minutiae of the manuscript that you lose all perspective on whether it’s still working overall or not.  By the end of one editing day I’d become convinced that I was actually making it worse, not better!  Thankfully I could console myself that at least I’d left in the bits that my pre-readers had told me that they liked the best, so it couldn’t be a complete write-off :-)

So, with my Arvon course looming and my keenness to finish this draft and hand it over to my husband for a final (in my dreams!) check, I’d better go and get on with some writing!  Talking about writing is so enjoyable but it doesn’t get the job done :-)

Trump-tastic Trouser Truffles (thanks Dan!)

What an awesome thing crowd-sourcing is - Facebook at its best :-)

I’ve recently had my most popular status on Facebook and it was all about farts.  Or rather what they could be called instead of “fart”.  Who knew that it would grab so many people’s attention and interest?!

Here’s why I did it (aside from the fact that it was serious fun and I might just have to do it again for no good reason!).  Jeannie’s feedback on my manuscript was really encouraging– which I wasn’t expecting as I’d started to convince myself it was complete rubbish (very common for writers to swing between “this is great” and “this is tosh” with their work, often within the same 10 minute period).  However, one seemingly small, but actually massive, thing she flagged up was my use of “whizz” as the codeword my two main characters use for “fart”.

It’s American for “pee”, which I guess I knew but had conveniently forgotten.  Now who knows whether or not this book will ever get published but, just in case it does, it makes sense to smooth its path to being published globally as well and avoid obvious pitfalls like that from the start.

The BIG problem is that “whizz” is used a lot in the book, when they’re discussing farts.  Plus Ben (the lead character) is a runner, so it plays on the idea that running fast could also be described as whizzing (it makes sense when you read the book – at least I hope it does!).  Any alternative word has to nicely fit both uses, so what on earth could be an appropriate substitute?!

Disheartened I turned to my friends for help.  And what a wonderful crazy wave of creativity I was met with!!!  No less than 54 inspired suggestions :-)

I was then faced with the new problem of selecting the right one!   “Fluff” was my initial favourite (thank you Natalie and others) until I realised that it’s quite common for ladies to use that term for farting anyway.  Next I loved “traf” (thank you Jodie), especially as kids think it’s fun to spell words backwards.  I told Jeannie about this change and she asked if I’d googled it to check it out.

Oh.  My.  Goodness.  Thence began an Urban Dictionary education I wish I hadn’t needed to have.  I do have to be thorough, especially with a kids’ book, so it is a necessary evil!  Right, I’m not using “traf” then :-(  

Okay, I’ll change “fluff” to “floof” I thought.  That’s a completely made up word.  Apparently not.  It’s slang for ladies’ bits.  Great.

I checked out “flump” and “gurgler” (thanks Tom) before despairing completely.  What is the world coming to?  Has every word been corrupted and got a dodgy alternative meaning??

Just before I chucked the whole manuscript in the bin, thankfully inspiration came to me in a swoosh.  And “swoosh” it almost was, but it's not completely perfect on the Urban Dictionary and Nike might take issue.  However, I think I can get away with “whoosh”.  Similar onomatopoeia to “whizz”, but with no majorly dodgy connotations (that I’ve managed to find so far, anyway).

I’ve tweaked the scene where Ben and Ned discuss what to call his farts and it’s even funnier and richer now thanks to the inclusion of some of your suggestions.  If the book gets published as a series (my ultimate hope!) then I’ll be able to incorporate more of these crazy and wonderful words in the future (subject to the Urban Dictionary test).  If you provided any of these ideas then THANK YOU!!  I may not have used your exact suggestions as my replacement word but your creativity fuelled my creativity.  It was a real pleasure to have you involved in part of my writing journey too - feel free to join in again sometime :-)

Sharing My "Baby" (the detailed progress update!)

I’ve been pretty philosophical in recent posts (and will be again!), so I figured a real progress update was in order for a change.  The last one I did shared that editing the second draft is much harder than writing the first draft, as it’s a much more skilled task. 

A decisive moment in that process came when I got a few days holiday in America back in March.  It gave me the time and space to lay my book out in chapters - each with a post-it summarising what happens in that section - to look at its structure and progress. 

What a simple but powerful act that was!  Possibly it would be for any writer but because I’m such a visual person, seeing it like this meant I instantly understood how it fitted together and where it didn't work.  It enabled me to iron out various issues with the manuscript – especially with its timings.  So, just before the Easter holidays I completed the second draft and printed it out to give to a couple of families (as well as mine) to read and critique. 

Sharing my “baby” was a scary thing!  I've kept it close to my chest since its conception, and no one has read more than about a page of it so far.  But despite the fact I’m such a perfectionist and my own harshest critic, I needed external feedback before I could take it much further.  So I handed over the manuscripts.  And then waited with great fear and trepidation!

I expected the feedback from Jeannie, my writing accountability partner, to be tough. After all, she's a writer and she would be able to pick weak points apart. So I was flabbergasted and thrilled that it was really positive and encouraging.  She made me believe that I actually might be able to do this!  There were plenty of suggestions for tweaks, but overall her and her kids had loved it. Especially - and most importantly - her 8 year old son (the book is aimed at 7-10 year olds, especially boys)!

With the second lot of feedback, I’d foolishly asked my friends to be extremely critical – mainly coz I thought they’d be too nice otherwise – and so it was own fault that I got what I asked for!  It was a painful, but powerful lesson for me about how to ask for feedback.  It’s just as important to ask people what they like and what they think works, as well as what they don’t like and what doesn’t work.  Without the positive stuff it’s too easy to feel demoralised and want to use the manuscript to light a fire that evening!

I also learnt that while feedback from anyone can be helpful, it’s particularly effective if you’re careful who you ask too.  What the target audience think is key.  One of my 12 year old son’s first comments when I asked him for feedback was “It’s not exactly The Hunger Games, is it?”  Er no, sweetheart, it isn’t meant to be :-S  Feedback from a 12 year old girl was that it wasn’t her cup of tea, but she could see that 7-10 year old boys might like it.  That’s not to say that these kids’ opinions aren’t useful, but they're unlikely to be as valuable as feedback from the specific target audience.

Feedback is also subjective and I’m now working through it, deciding what I’ll change on the basis of it and what I won’t.  That can be very complicated though.  For example, the age-appropriateness of language I use at times was one thing flagged up.  To some extent I agree with those comments and have made a few changes.  BUT, I also examined the language used in books like “How To Train Your Dragon” and David Walliams’ “Billionaire Boy” and became completely confused.

“HTTYD” is sometimes defined as being for 7-10 year olds and sometimes for 8-12 year olds.  They’re actually quite different categories and represent a massive range of reading abilities!  The book contains some fabulous words, including many that wouldn’t fit into the recommended guidelines for a 7-10 year old age range.  So, aside from the wonderful but challenging Viking names, we also find “preposterously” on the first page, “initiation” on the second and “cacophony” on the fifth.

In “Billionaire Boy” (a similarly confusing age-categorised book) we also have “preposterously” on the second page, as well as “masseuse” on the third and “palatial” not long after.

So, yes, there are generally accepted norms, but rules are always made to be broken and it can be fun to see what you can get away with.  I love all these words!  Also, kids always need a few new or difficult words.  If it’s in context it can be figured out.  If not, then you can ask someone else, or just get on and not let that one word detract from all the other thousands of words in the book.  It’s about balance and getting that right is my current challenge.

Having your word critiqued is tough!  I doubt it ever gets easier either, but I’m desperately hoping I never get a review like this one of Dan Brown’s new novel.  I don’t care how many books you’ve written or how many millions you have – to be taken apart in such a shrewd and public way, albeit brilliant as well, has still got to hurt.

I’m now working on the third edit of the manuscript – this may seem like a never-ending process to you non-writers out there but allegedly seven (yes, seven!) drafts is the norm.  I’m hoping for four edits, maximum five (please!)!

P.S. Jeannie’s feedback also raised an interesting big issue which I'll explain in more detail in a few days… ;-)